Have you ever had one of those days when your mind feels troubled, where all you can do is bow your head and thank God that you can still feel His presence around you? Have you ever asked yourself what life had in store for you, looking at yourself wondering if God could ever use someone as messed up as you? You’re not alone. Many of God’s saints feel this way, myself included.
I was one of those late bloomers of God. I went half my adult life not really knowing him and not really caring to know him. I lived each day as it came, doing my own thing, fighting my way through the situations as they arose and doing a pretty good job at it, if I say so myself. One day, much to my dismay, my life took a turn for the worse. Situations were coming at me faster then I could react to them. I no sooner entered into a storm and another began. It got so bad, I couldnt even figure out where one storm ended and the next began. I felt like I was in “hell”, resolving in my mind that nothing could be so bad. Who was thinking about God at a time like this, I sure wasnt. In my mind, I was too busy and too tired trying to deal with the cards dealt to search out something I couldnt see, I couldnt feel, I couldnt taste, I couldnt hear and I sure didnt know, yet God had other plans for me.
Days past as the hardships took their toll. Bills were piling up, finances were at their worst, children were cutting up, my reputation was the pits, and more. In my numbness, I asked myself, “Lord, what else could go wrong”. Funny huh? I didnt know anything about God, yet I was asking Him for an answer to my question, never really expecting to receive an answer. How many of you know that our questions eventually get answered? The real question is, are you ready to hear the answer? Sometimes an answer isnt always one we want to hear or accept, so be careful what you ask for. Much to my dismay, soon I would have an answer.
I am in the military, so life can be ever changing and hard sometimes. People arent always the greatest things to be around, as personalities flare. To me, I was living in a war zone at work, living in a war zone at home and had no place to go for relief and peace. Trouble was all around me. I was a walking magnet for trouble and everyone knew it. All alone, isolated, stressed, broke, busted, and truly disgusted, I began to change. I became bitter, angry, depressed, lonely, sad and so much more, changing minute by minute. In my mind, I had reached rock bottom. What I would hear next would change me forever.
One day, I receive news that I may have cervical cancer. Those words, still etched in my mind, shook me so hard that my only recourse was to cower into my closet and cry out to a God I didnt even know. I could hear him say, “How long? How long did you have to walk in the wilderness before you submitted to me? How long would you have tried to fix it all alone? I made the problem too big for you so that you would recognize that it wasnt you making the difference but me. Now are you ready to hear me? Are you ready to serve me? Are you ready to give me your life? That day, I gave my life to God and believe me, things have never been the same since. Was it hard? Yes. Did I change overnight? No, but I did change and for the better. What was the key? God, was the key to it all and I have never been more blessed.
Isnt that what God wants? Is He not looking for folks like you and me, who have been broke, busted, disgusted, marred, cracked, depressed, troubled, and dirtied by our ways of living and our messed up beliefs? Like Moses, God was looking for a willing soul to serve Him. Moses didnt understand how he could be used, especially after he had messed things up so badly. He spent forty years hiding from it all, relinquishing in his mind that he would never amount to anything. Isnt that just like us, when we fail, we run from the very thing that defeated us? Have you ever noticed how these very things are the very things we repeatedly come face to face with? Ever wonder why?
God has a plan for each one of us. Some of us accept His call, others run, while others reject Him totally. Our choices determine our destiny. As with every other day, Moses’ focus was on feeding his father-in-laws flock. He’s in the middle of the desert, a place where green life is scarce at best. Looking for a clump of green, he retreats to the back side of the mountain. But what should he see? The most surprising of all things – a burning bush that isnt consumed. Curious, he shrugs off the tasks of the day and proceeds to satisfy his curiosity.
The Bible tells us that when Moses sidestep his normal routine to satisfy this curiosity, God spoke. Notice the two happened simultaneously, one occurring as the result of the other. God is looking for a few God fearing men and women that will separate themselves from their normal routines, to seek Him out. You may say, but I am not like Moses. He had it all together. Did he really? Moses was a murderer, not to mention he had an issue with controlling his anger. This same Moses who witnessed the many mighty miracles, even had bouts of doubt and fear. We are no different than Moses. God can even use the least likely – prostitutes, drug addicts, jail birds, adulterers and more. For it is these very people that have walked the paths of the lost, that talk to the hearts of those walking the same. “Any old Bush Will Do”, if we would only choose to separate ourselves for God’s service.
Are you one that God is calling? Are you running away in hopes that God will choose another in your place? Are you too ashamed of your past to accept a future in service to God? If you are, know that God is looking for a “willing bush”, saying to you – “Any old bush will do, for in my hands extraordinary things will happen, if you only choose to serve me as you are”. I can tell you firsthandedly, my life has never been the same since I chose God. Now will you?
Tags: burning bush, cervical cancer, destiny, God, Moses, saints
